Saturday, 8 May 2010

The reconstruction of a very silly event

This is one of those stories that’s appropriate to recall when sat around a campfire (or BBQ) with friends whilst having a few drinks…
 
After talking briefly on the phone this morning to a friend, we were both recalling our respective experiences of going overboard (literally, without the aid of alcohol). So for anyone who wants to have a laugh at my expense…
 
We were moored over the other end of the marina at the time, there was no mat on the jetty, it was October and slippy. So here’s my step-by-step guide how NOT to climb off a boat with a deep well deck…
 
This is what clever clogs here tried to do – get up onto the jetty without using the step. In case you’re wondering, I was wearing clever clogs trainers at the time, not these one’s here, I’ve splashed out on several more pairs since then…
 
So whilst the front trainer slipped into the distance I found myself off balance and doing the splits. In an instant the brain cell informed me that best case scenario would be a broken leg, second best would be broken hip(s), third best – splitting in two completely was unthinkable. The only other alternative was to launch oneself in backwards…
 
005
 
Whilst avoiding the bow, the jetty, and the ropes…
 
006
 
As I gracefully belly flopped through the air, my left leg clanged against the side here on take off, fortunately I missed all the other obstacles…
 
011
 
But one of these appeared on my leg later…
 
016
 
This is what I should’ve done…
 
013
 
And have done ever since…
 
014 

The "christening" happened just five days after we bought the boat. I think I must’ve broken the record for “the person to fall in the soonest after buying a boat” or “the shortest time between ownership and falling in.” Ah yes, it all comes flooding back now.
 
Back round the camp fire for a moment, it’s much more entertaining when someone else has also dived into the depths for whatever reason. That’s when you start comparing notes about things like angles of trajectory, the cause, what went in with you, how deep it was and then there’s also the stupidity factor to take into account. I know of someone who went in backwards taking a table (full of food) with him – bet that was fun.
 
Anyway, my own personal Christening in canal water was October 2007, and I was wearing a brand new JUMPER at the time. My writing skills were a bit wooden back then, and reading what I penned at the time is quite boring now. Even though the event itself was startling. 

Coming up tomorrow: How the NEW shower spectacularly fell to bits this morning when I switched it on, oops, wasn’t me…

No comments:

Post a Comment