Saturday, 23 April 2011

Now then, now then, let´s have some decorum please

Oh, ok then sod it…
Two boat loads of friends arrived yesterday and moored up either side of us. It transpires that some of us thought we were going to the pub for a meal, some of us thought we were just having a BBQ, and some of us just didn’t know what we were doing – no make that all of us.
So we had a little discussion about things and came to the conclusion that there’d be “no room at the inn” as it were, seeing as half the marina was already installed at the pub (including boats). Which meant we’d probably have had to wait about three hours for food to actually arrive at the table, that’s if we could get a table in the first place.
At this point we implemented a voting system which turned out to be an overwhelming “YES” vote for the BBQ, and THAT was when we realised we hadn’t got enough food for all of us… I mean why didn’t we discuss all this a couple of days ago? Just how daft are we? (No don’t answer that). It’s not like we hadn’t planned all this, we had – well, to the best of our ability which leaves a lot to be desired.
So Mark the Spark and Ian set off on a mammoth expedition to find Tesco, (across some fields, then about two miles walk). We all waved them tatty bye and said we’d see them next week sometime. Which also meant there might’ve been enough food for the rest of us (should they only return next week). But it was about an hour after they’d set off, Heth the Feth here suddenly realised it was Good Friday. So would Tesco even be open when they got there??? Oops…
Fortunately the Tesco Trauma place was still open (just), so they came back in a taxi and then trudged back across the fields again. Turned out taxis don’t do fields.
Being as a BBQ is a “man thing” we all sat outside on the towpath drinking copious amounts of wine. Meanwhile Dave and Mark did all the cooking, whilst also drinking copious amounts of beer. My contribution was to go inside, hook my laptop up to the sound system so Coldplay, Oasis, and Snow Patrol could join in.
The BBQ wouldn’t light at first, so Mark the SPARK put cooking oil on it. Good idea that (sarcasm), because it suddenly exploded into a roaring furnace of a bonfire. There were bits of chicken flying about all around (excuse pun), and one of our “Tesco Finest” beef burgers spontaneously combusted itself.  
Normal people can simply say “We had a BBQ and it was very nice.” End of. But if we’re involved there’s always some kind of saga goes with it.
Anyway this was the end result – all THREE tables of it, and yes it was VERY nice…


Some members of the rabble…
Later on we all put our Sunday best on and set off up the towpath to the pub, some of us were walking in a straight line more successfully than others.
Amazingly we found a table outside, I was checking it out for bird poo or something equally as cruddy. Seeing as the place was mobbed, one empty table is a bit suspect. (Not that any of us would’ve noticed a bit ‘o shit). It was still about 22 degrees when we sat down, very pleasant. Later on we could see thunder clouds moving on in, so we staggered back to the boats.
Mark the Spark brought round his vast selection of extremely silly board games. I can remember we played two of them and our team even won the first one! (Ha! AND How?). But don’t ask me what either of them were called because I’ve no idea. I’m sure there was lots of cheating going on.
So that’s yet another night to go in the archives of “sense and sensibility” then. Blimey, think I’m going have to start another library.
PS: I bet the marina looks deserted, especially our pier…

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